Grew up with his mother care for the two frail husband, novelist Jane Heller vowed never saddled with an unhealthy teammates. However, when her own husband was diagnosed suffering from a debilitating disease, she has become her greatest fear: a caregiver.
"You'd better not die, or I'll kill you" draws its title, she whispered, her husband, he was advanced surgery. This is black humor, although the requirements of her new role with her.
"You'd better not die, or I'll kill you: a survival guide for caregivers to keep your body healthy, a good mental state," Jane Heller, Chronicle Books, $ 18.95
There are about 65 million caregivers in the United States, according to the National Family Caregivers Association, which means that 29% of the population "is stretching, walking around in all directions on the pull," Ms. Heller wrote. Agencies, websites, books and blog help Heller's purpose is to provide a different point of view to have the strength to deal with their emotions and the importance of caring for others.
She convened an advisory panel of medical experts, patient advocates and caregivers of the students, like her, in the most severe cases, good at finding the humor. "Everyone has some destructive beloved a powerful and important husband felling of lung cancer, parents with Alzheimer's disease, a dangerous anorexia children.
Her husband, Crohn's disease, an incurable intestinal inflammation, to send him to the emergency room, because most people tend to frequent Starbucks SBUX +0.14%. "After the first surgery, a section of his intestines poke incision in his abdomen, and even frightened by the home health nurse.
Chapter of the Heller Ms. tackle difficult subjects, such as gender? Romantic? Exactly who gets what? "And when the relatives began a different personality, you begin to hope that they will disappear." On one occasion, when her husband was pumping to steroids, bodies bloated, manic, her fantasy to kill him, but he realized it was his Crohn's disease, and she wanted to die.
She found the sweet nurse and pull Shirley MacLaine in "Terms of Endearment" and loud requirements to take care of her husband should accept. She provides exercise, diet and meditation techniques to stay in shape, reduce stress, long way in the future. Unexpected moments of happiness for caregivers who roll up their sleeves and deal with it, and found the inner strength to cope with any adversity, closer bonds with their loved ones, Ms. Heller found.
She would joke in this regard, too, said she is not obsessed with her husband was having an affair, he said he wanted a doctor, because he was always in a doctor's. But in serious mode, she found a real glimmer of hope: her beloved great respect, "watching him suffer all these years, never dissolved into self-pity."
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